From ‘Full O’ Crap’ to No-Crap: Turd Blossoms in a CrapFest

I often receive emails pointing out that what I post here is nothing but pure “crap.” So for these more astute readers I will define the nature of enlightenment in the scatological concepts they easily understand.

On your life journey, you have a choice. Comfort or truth. One allows mindless wallowing in your ‘crap,’ pretending all the while to be crapless. The other demands you free yourself from ALL your 'crap' and engage the dream with the excitement and vigor one should expect from playing out crappy fantasies and lies.

The fact is that Truth is completely crap-free.

But how do you know if what you’re attached to is not truth, but really ‘crap’?

Simple. Do you care about it?

Not sure? Cut it loose and find out. When you feel the pain of loss then know that it was ‘crap.’ Slash free the moorings on all your values and morality and send adrift your beliefs about everything you own and everyone you relate to. Flush all your dreams and aspirations down the toilet and feel the sharp exquisite pain of self-dissolution or the slash and burn of the conceptual “you” (crap).

But the "good" part is that after you cut away all your ‘crap,’ you can bring it all back into play with no attachment whatsoever. Play infinitely in the world simply through knowing the difference between 'crap' and truth.

Realizing ‘crap’ is quite liberating and does free one to fully engage the 'crap' of others and the world, absent the burden of all your ‘crap.’ What else stands between you and complete freedom but ‘crap’? What is it that separates and divides, but your ‘crap’? (not theirs, just yours. Ego projection is 'crap').

We're all attached to ‘crap.’ It's the nature of existence to jump and splash around in ‘crap.’ There’s NO denying we all stink to high heaven. But the olfactory is the weakest sense, causing you to remain unconsciously mired in the putrid stench of our own ‘crap.’ Although the stink never really goes away, the smell always dissipates for "you," which allows continuing the ‘crapfest’ with all the other ‘crap-slingers’ you’ve come to know, “love” and rely on to validate your ‘crap’ (which reminds me of a famous Koan: If a bear shits in the woods, and no ones around to smell it, does it stink?)

The world is a ‘crapfest’ of complete strangers only known by their 'crap' and all validating each others 'crap' as a means of denying a crappy existence. “Hey, Billy Bob. That’s some great crap you got there. How many years of school to get that crap?”

However, it's not necessarily the fact that you're attached to your 'crap.' It's that you're attached to 'crap' that you are not even aware of as 'crap.' To not know your life smells like 'crap' is ignorance. The unexamined 'crap' is not worth living (through).

 

Enlightenment is nothing more than knowing 'crap' when you smell it and not pretending it's anything but 'crap.' Whenever you feel all egocentrically bloated over some important choice you have made, recognize it as a time to unload some 'crap.' It’s amazing how oppressed some are by the weight of their own 'crap.' You can see the strain of retention in their faces. The pain of too many years carrying around way too much 'crap.' But they’re loathe to let go their 'crap' when they see so many others carrying more 'crap' than they have, because hauling around a load of 'crap' is a national pastime.

But you think it's important 'crap' which is okay. Lotsa important "crap" out there, but more importantly it’s still 'crap.' What you have yet to realize is that your important 'crap' is just as 'crappy' as what you consider dumb 'crap.' So stop differentiating between 'crap.'

Consider “enlightenment” merely the crystal clear recognition of ‘crap’ with NO delusion it being anything else but “crap.” Truth is really nothing more than this…

Do you say to yourself, "oh, how I love the crap I worked so hard to achieve!"? Of course not!

But shouldn’t you?

When you reach a certain point...you will. You will laugh, “ha ha! look at all the crap I call my life.” You will proclaim this without anguish and dread, but with pure joy over how you could of ever thought your 'crap' was anything more than just plain old ‘crap.’ And this time you will mean it right down to your sphincter.

Your emancipation proclamation from ‘crap’ will be intensely liberating. But does this mean you will no longer be playing in 'crap'? Not at all. Enlightenment only requires your full realization of 'crap.' From this realization, what happens next makes NO difference whatsoever. When the ‘crap' is seen as 'crap,' it’s immediately outa your hands (cause who wants to hold crap?) and you need no longer rely on the ego-self that only knows it exists through its incessant ‘crap’ slinging. 

 

No matter how you slice up your 'crap’ (continually justifying its necessity by claiming it doesn’t stink) you still got nuthin' but ‘crap.’ Go ahead and trying slicing up your 'crap' and learn for yourself how crappy 'crap' must remain no matter how it is formulated, justified, explained, defined, pontificated, internalized, externalized, spiritualized and configured through all your crappy concepts which you righteously superimpose upon 'crap' as a means of making it less…crappy. Consider 'crap-cutting' an enlightenment "action-step" and get back to me with your observations.

Oh, but I'll bet you'll squirm and whine, "ewe, I don't wanna cut up my own ‘crap’! This is why so few have attained liberation from 'crap.' Turd dissection is a crappy business, but it must be done for Craplessness to be experienced.

Yet, keep in mind, in a world of 'crap,' some crap is a higher grade 'crap' than that which you have become accustomed to and learn nothing from in your desire to hold onto your own special ‘crap.’ Higher grade ‘crap’ is a learning vehicle from which you will come to recognize your constant attempts to distinguish between levels of 'crap' is nothing but another instance of pure crap.

Consider it the "turd blossom" from which your enlightenment will bloom. 

 

But you must not reject and be willing to accept, and breathe deeply, of the 'crap' which makes learning possible. Whenever you feel that deep gnawing, burning sensation in your gut, recognize that you have come face to face with “The Teacher” in the form of useless 'crap' and the need to unload it. Whenever you experience a sense of elation or joy, listen for the tiny voice saying “this too will pass,” and realize it’s just more ‘crap.’

One day you will recognize that every thought an ego-self “thinks” is 'crap.' Every belief, every emotion and every thought is 'crap.' A famous Master Teacher once said, “thoughts are like assholes, everybody’s got 'em and they all stink.” The Spotless Mind is obviously crap-free.

Pretending to discern the universal nature of all 'crap' is disingenuous, particularly when you continue to assert or even imply that some crap has value above others. The nature of crap is crappy. All crap exists to demonstrate itself as nothing more than ‘crap.’ Feigning an experience of NO-CRAP, in the presence of the truly crapless, is just another example of pure 'crap' and you will inevitably be revealed as stinky. In this reality you love so much (crap) you demand levels and grades of 'crap,' which only keeps you transfixed on your smelly dualistic world, with no relief from the continued stench of your own 'crap.'

You are literally suffocating. All you need do is stop denying the stink and seek fresh air.

Therefore, it is true that I am providing 'crap.' However, within your crappy reality all learning must utilize the 'crap' provided. Henceforth, I will continue to provide my usual 'crap' from which the true nature of 'crap' may be exposed to those who wish to see their 'crap' in vivid Technicolor (never a pretty sight).

Look at your life. Your 'crap' demands a mind-numbing regularity to your existence and you find the need for justification utterly exhausting. How does one justify 'crap'? Simply by holding ones nose? Deep down you recognize that egocentricity is 'crap' and you long to jump free of the pile you created.

Reject looking closely at your 'crap' and continue to suffer through the usual 'crap' by your usual method of pretending your 'crap' really doesn't smell that bad, in comparison to other 'crap' that really stinks up the joint.

Attain the realization that it is all 'crap' and finally rise above the stench you have become so accustomed to by disingenuously claiming it actually…

…smells like roses.

Dreamosis

You want to fit it ALL tightly into your containers. But in a dream everything melts into everything else and nothing is what it seems even the exact moment it is seen (since egocentric moments are infused with past/future).

In a dream, boundaries, parameters, borders, lines, etc, magically disappear. Values and morality flip flop from side to side, and back again and logic becomes nothing more than a game of chance.

The only integrity available in a dream is that it IS a dream and nothing more.

Egocentric dreamosis grits and grinds over making it mean what it's supposed to mean and this is how a dream is woven. Meanings dance madly around together, until it's damn near impossible to tell what anything means. But the discerning egocentric 'eyeball' is quick to conjure up meanings from what seems like total nonsense. It simply injects into the void what was NOT there before. This is how nothing can always mean something (at least for a little while, until it dissolves away like it always must).

Dreamosis has the strange paradox of experiencing symptoms that arise from LOSS. A dream of deprivation is constructed from what you DO NOT want, not from what you DO want. You dream of wealth because you DO NOT want to be poor. You dream of fame because you DO NOT want obscurity and you dream of love simply because you DO NOT want to be alone.

Egocentricity has no idea what it wants and must conjure up its desires directly from what it does NOT want which is always a reflection of what it believes it LACKS.

Yet, because the egocentric self is nothing but a dreamed-up concept of "you," it must conjure up supporting concepts to make the dream of "you" seem real. What good would a "self" be without a body or a body without a world in which other bodies come together for a spell and then, just as quickly, split apart never to be experienced again. Hence, it is crucial to egocentricity that the dream determine purpose and not YOU, because that's the purpose of the dream.

You paint the dream with broad strokes, but rant and rave over the details.

Why lament all the ways of dropping dead in a dream of death. It's patently absurd to feel buffeted about in a dream of chance and still grieve missed opportunities and it is pure insanity to dream of hate and still seek to find the love you have insured cannot be found no matter where you look in a dream.

To do this is to be afflicted with the condition of dreamosis and the only cure is to recognize that the nature of your disease...

...is a dream.

Artwork by Marco Escobedo - "Disintegration"

Dreamiferous

The dream is always yours. Yet, egocentricity propels it away and restricts it to limiting coordinates or finite "truths" of space/time and demands others determine for us what will happen.

It could be anything you choose, if you KNEW you had the free-will to do so.

You are your mind and, although you do admit complete control of that mind, you do NOT trust what it shows you. The paradox of this is not lost on you, but you have no idea as to how to collapse that paradox and, therefore, you continue to distrust your "world."

You are dreamiferous, because the dream is abundantly apparent to you and cascades in vivid color within you. It fills your mind completely and you can't deny this no matter what limits you apply to that experience. The experience is always yours to do with as you please.

What do YOU do with it?

Some try renouncing it, escaping it, denying it, hating some parts and loving others. But it continues to claim your mind and it batters and beats you down.

Many have difficulties with the concept of "dream" or "illusion."

Okay, how about "idea"?

Possibly this fits better for you than that of a “dream.” Consider that every experience that has “outside” coordinates (time/space, etc) is an “inside” experience. It is only an "idea." This plays into “seek the kingdom of heaven within” (paraphrased).

If the “inside” experience, of an “outside” world, is not to your liking, what responsibility rests upon you to change the inside as opposed to simply lament the “outside” or seek, through relative applications of good-will and charity (not always amenable to others), to change the “outside"?

For centuries we have sought to change the outside and have generally failed completely, with little to show for. There is a growing movement that seeks to alter that equation. But they are not very apparent on the “outside.” For them, change is very much a factor of the “inside” but completely absent the “outside.”

In your dream you are victim to an "outside" that is draining you of all "inner" ecstasy. Your Mojo is depleted and experiences of a material world is making you into nothing but a "thing."

If you want the sublime you must dream it TRUE. Otherwise, it simply cannot be any other way. The rapture of nirvana is nothing but another condition of an infinite dream that knows it is nothing but a dream.
 

You believe you are expert at determining what you do NOT want, but have little idea as to what you DO want. Hence, what you receive must leave you, as you MUST always seek something else. The moment you FIND what you seek, doubt must enter proving it is NOT for you. Nothing has ever sustained you and, from consistent reliance on this past learning, you have preordained that nothing ever will. Can you NOT see this?

You are the cause of change. You do not trust your “self” nor do you trust what that “self” wants and makes real by wanting.

You have little choice but to trust in something NOT of “you.” This seems to be the most difficult choice you MUST make and one that you appear to be avoiding at all costs, because it is the ONLY choice you need EVER make again.

You are approaching that decision and the pain of this seems excruciating. But can you not see the experiences you have allowed your “self” only bring you closer to that choice? Can you not see that you do this to yourself and can you not see the reason why? Can you not see that you are and have always been the only teacher?

Trust the purpose of what you make “real,” because everything has a purpose. You may determine that you do NOT want what you have, but clearly, the purpose of a dream is to awaken TO the dream and everything in that dream must conform to that purpose. The purpose of what is NOT “real” can only be to show you what IS. Nothing in a dream can be trusted and the purpose of what you do NOT trust is to show you what you CAN.

That which desires to awake, trusts the dream to teach it. Your dream has this purpose. Trust in that purpose and superimpose that purpose upon your dreaming.

Artwork by Jose Emroca Flores - "Against the Grain"