I tend to have difficulties with the "mystical" descriptors or concepts, especially when they endure centuries of translation, and the neo-masters to insist that they are the only valid "pointers." Therefore, I'm one of the few who actually question the ancient masters (and my ego loves me for it!)
This is why I look at the words used to define that which we seek to learn in order to essentially rise above our 'ego-self.' I tend to parse and split the concepts apart in a game of infinite reductionism.
This type of reductionism can be very precarious because, rather than start from the bottom and add up, I start from the top and subtract down. Therefore, rather than microscopically examining the concept of, say, "body," which is very gross and concrete, I start with the concept of "enlightenment" which is highly abstract and mystical (not that there is a method to this madness, it's just more fun and leads to all kinds of neat metaphysical poetry). However, most egos demand results, as in attachment to some concept as anchor. We want the truth! Infinite reductionism will not give you truth....sorry (because "you can't handle the Truth!!")
For instance, I have perseverated to distraction, with regard to the mystical concepts of transcendence vs transformation. Many would argue that they mean the same, yet, the ego-self is obsessed with concepts. If everything is nothing but conceptual, to understand the concepts that you fixate on is crucial to understanding what you ARE and maybe even getting some freedom from a new and improved definition of 'self.' In following any "spiritual path" you are essentially tweaking or redefining your definition of ego-self and based on the conceptual ideology of the 'path.'
Feel free to deconstruct all your experiences...I do...
Why do you do the things you have evaluated as needing to be done? What life- games are important to you? What are all these numerous purposes and functions you attach to as necessary or important? Why go to work, make money, have sex, be entertained, love others, stay alive, be healthy, etc, etc, etc? Why do anything at all? When you come to realize the conceptual nature of reality, you can no longer avoid scientifically examining the games you play. This reductionism can be a disparaging or rejuvenating experience, depending on your current self-concept.
DECONSTRUCTING THE MYSTICAL EXPERIENCE
How can deconstruction be seen in a way to facilitate a transformation as opposed to the centuries of wisdom traditions which teach that we must transcend or essentially leave what IS behind, since it is only illusion? The "master" knows you cannot dissociate from your self-concepts without great fear and, so, the master provides new concepts for you to fixate on in the hope that these new concepts will lead you to a complete 'conception-less' existence. I contend that the new concepts only keep you more attached to an ego-self.
It seems the problem is that the more I wish to transcend what is NOT 'real,'or is illusionary, the more I make it 'real.'
Quite a paradox.
Thus, the more you seek for the mystical experience, the more you push it away as something you are obviously not 'transcendent' enough to experience. This results in your living out a conceptual belief of having the experience as a future expectation and this denies the timelessness of the experience. Because, as they teach, the moment you assert IT IS, in that very moment the past is dissolved. But this can never happen since it was the past that created a "you" who has the experience and interprets it as "mystical.'
Therefore, in all your "mystical" experiences, interpreted by ego-self, like "damn! that was friggin' myyyyystical!" each experience has the past 'self' wrapped up in the interpretation of the experience.
If there is no past, "who" is it that has the experience of the moment, since you must identify with a past to be a 'person' experiencing the 'now.' The ego-self must, itself, be defined first, before the experience can be subsequently defined or interpreted. All experience is subsequent to an ego-self first being experienced.
Good grief! Could it be possible that you are in a mystical experience right this very moment? Cowabunga!
But if that's true, why don't you define this very moment as 'mystical'? It must be that you are engaged in your ego defined "unawakened," inadequacy in the continued belief that you need to be more or higher than what you are.
The enlightened masters and gurus inform you that, yes, you are obviously not "awakened." But no worry, follow this path and experience your awakened nature.
Ahhhh, but wait....the path requires an unawakened nature prior to the awakened nature realization!
Huh?
That must mean that your unawakened nature is essentially more valuable to you than your awakened nature. Because, if you're NOT who you were when you awaken, "who" is it that has determined that you're awakened?
2 comments: