Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Human Egocentrica Mammalia: Destroyer of Worlds

The post-modern social fictions of the collective egocentrica mammalian ‘self’ are pathetic momentary wisps of smoke, quickly dissolving into insignificant anonymity, which demands human egocentrica consistently twist and bend his own fictions to validate his importance.

Validation is necessary due to the undeniable awareness of his abject insignificance. Awareness right down to the sinew of his bones, chronically informing him that his words don’t matter, his actions change nothing, his thoughts are useless to divert his eventual death and a causal order at work in the entirety of the universe (including an indifferent natural world) could easily smash him to smithereens in an instant without the slightest logical reason or rationale.

Alas, enter the ‘prefrontal cortex,’ with trillions of historically ‘significant stories,’ neurally hard-wired through childhood social programming, serving no other purpose but to provide an individual sense of grandiose self-importance.

Based on the predetermined causal order, that clearly holds nothing sacred, human egocentrica mammalia has little choice but to desperately press himself against that unfolding order. A reality that could care less for his complaints when his fictional "lifestyles" eventually FAIL (as they always must) to actualize him into some tiny semblance of magnanimous significance. This desperation is so psycho-emotionally profound that egocentrica mammalia will employ acts of destruction and death to insure and reinforce his individual, independent significance.
“The sense of insignificance and death anxiety have been shown to play a key role in everything from terrorism to mass shootings to extremist religious and political ideologies to obsessions with materialism and wealth. Just about all that is violent and corrupt in our world seems connected to it.” LINK
It is egocentrica mammalia’s blatant insignificance, deeply hard-wired in his primitive limbic system, that drives him to wipe out entire populations (populations similarly existing within fictional boundaries, participating in fictional activities) as a means of asserting his own fictional significance, and this has gone on since an individual ‘self’ electro-chemically crackled to life in some nebulous circuit in the 3 lbs of fat between his ears and, will obviously continue until his pursuit of significance eventually overrides all his circuits and he gets sucked up and consumed by his own electro-chemical brain matter, with billions of neurons overloaded by his incessant need to escape the undeniable fact of his own pathetic lack of significance to the universal causal order.

The genetic nature of human egocentricity is based on one specific variable, not available anywhere else in the predetermined causal order of manifest existence, and that variable is… the capacity to ask ”why.”

Nowhere else in the universe is “why” even slightly entertained. Everything is as it must be, and has always been, based on a predetermined natural order that has been expanding and unfolding since time began. But the delusional hubris of egocentrica mammalia actually proclaims an answer and that answer is a product of ego-centered delusion, based on the all-encompassing fear of his abject insignificance, resulting in a mental labyrinth of lies, fantasies, delusions, fabrications, mythologies and distorted beliefs.

Everything egocentrica does, he does to raise himself from the depths of his own microscopic insignificance within the grandeur of the universe, made vigorously apparent by the knowledge of his own eventual death.

Egocentrica mammalia pins his entire existence on the vagaries of “why” and constructs complex fictional realities to provide answers as to “why” he exists and what the purpose is to that existence.
Fictional stories give purpose to the purposeless. Yet, it is a desert mirage and the closer you get the more it dissolves into thin air.

Hence, egocentrica has constructed fictional societies to mask his insignificance through vapid goals, mundane and morbid distractions and futile aspirations and there are very few who will get close enough to see the emptiness that is actually apparent in all of it. 

“You” are absolutely of no significance to an indifferent predetermined causal order and that indoctrinated recognition only compels you to engage mythological fictions, absurd ideologies and blatantly ignorant belief systems to somehow deny the truth of your worthlessness to the predetermined causal order that allows you to exist at all and granted you the capacity to mentally construct your ‘self-ness’ as a means of engaging in fictional pursuits to fabricate fleeting experiences of significance.

But, of course, with a wave of his hand, death scatters all your significance into nothing, like a sand painting on a blustery day.
“The Grim Reaper has his hand up all our butts. He’s puppetting all of us because everything that we do, every project we undertake, child we have, building we build is because we know we are going to die. It’s the main driving force of our lives. If we ignore our death, we end up just going around completely oblivious to why we do the things we do!” Read more: Caitlin Doughty: Mortician + Death Activist | Rising Stars | OZY

 Artwork by Metalpiss

Saturday, August 9, 2014

The “Hero’s Journey” Follows a Neural Pathway

With some 86 billion neurons wired up to a trillion miles of dendritic connections, fueled by seemingly infinite synaptic electro-chemical interactions, there is a virtual universe between your ears and just as galaxies have no free-will to determine their fate, “you” are no different.
So tell me where, in all that…are “you” accountable? Which Neural pathways are “you” responsible for maintaining?
The journey of a thousand miles does not start with the first step, but with the first firing neuron, genetically formatted and bathed in varying amounts of motivation inducing dopamine, telling you when and where to go. The "Hero’s Journey" is a centuries old glorification of a free-willed egocentric mammalian ‘self,’ cloaked in the illusion of choice that, apparently, exists nowhere else in the predetermined natural order.
There is nothing you need do to be free. You are truly and undeniably free. Just allow the neural network to take you where it will (which will happen, whether you allow it or not)
Your “spiritual journey’ is housed entirely in your skull and there is no leaving those predetermined neural pathways. The paths you follow, wired up in your grey matter, were predetermined for you long before you were born (genetically and socio-culturally) and you have no choice but to go where they take you as they define and determine who you are and what you desire.

Nevertheless, your goal has always been not to follow your neuro-circuitry (cause the sheit in your head just constantly pisses you off!), but to seek out and follow someone else’s neural pathways, some “master teacher,” in the hopes of achieving the brain state that they vigorously claim as “awakening.”

For over half a century I have studied the products of other neurally predetermined “enlightened masters,” only to eventually jettison each and every one of those teachings as pure drivel (examples of that exist throughout this blog). Yet, in retrospect, it was necessary for me to encounter and burn through each and every “spiritual” ideology I engaged, since this is how the motherboard is fried. Yet, I had no idea I was doing this and had no conscious intention thereby. I longed for the one ideology that would save my sorry arse.

Escaping the path is part of the path and your chronically historical attempts to find the "right path" is all predetermined by the path you are now on. 

Thoughts have become particularly useless to me these days (as demonstrated by the diminishing posts appearing here). Regardless, thoughts arise as they always do, internally (pre-programmed neuro-cicuits) and externally (sensation) influenced, the only difference being, at this point in my “journey” I have experienced the complete abrogation of free-will (volitional choice and agency) and, hence, have become quite comfy cozy with whatever pops up in the gelatinous fat between my ears.

I really don’t give a fook about the thoughts in my head. “You,” on the other hand,  care deeply about what you ‘think,’ so much so that you actually avoid thinking, because of the chronically dumb sheit that incessantly arises in your cranium, or you seek out and diligently learn new strategic ways of ‘thinking’ to improve the "quality" of your life, in a rebellion against the very neuro-circuitry that determines the quality of your life and the motivational dopamine that bathes those circuits, to keep ‘em lit up like a Christmas tree.

I have absolutely no interest in being anyone’s “teacher” since, clearly, you will learn what you’re supposed to learn whether you want it or not (it's all predetermined). My interest is more about engaging with those who have suddenly realized that they are frying their motherboard, which has similarities in relation to stages, but completely dissimilar in how and when those stages are encountered. In that realization, the burn intensifies, because you’re not wired to want or expect it.

Before there was only fear that you were some sort of mental mutant, because you just couldn’t engage the social fictions with the rest of the socially programmed Egocentrica mammalians. But now, hopefully, you've come to a point where you enjoy the burn (if not, don't worry, you will)

You have been straying from the herd for decades and have no idea why and it bugs the sheit outa you. You’re disengaged, discombobulated, disenchanted and psycho-emotionally distorted, but only in relation to your egocentric brethren, who seem to exhibit excellent adherence to programming (but deep within the circuitry, they're beginning to fry too!). They don’t understand you and you are getting to the point where you don’t have a fooking clue as to what motivates them to engage in the fictional/mythical bullsheit they find so utterly fascinating. Feel free to disembark from the herd, if the spirit moves you, otherwise, your attempts to graze with the chomping cud eating cattle will eventually drive you bat sheit crazy (but, that may be necessary, if so prescribed by the causal order).

Your brain is hard-wired to accommodate fictional realities which, thereby, demand behavioral conformity. Every socially enchanted rule and law has a corresponding neural pathway because, if it was not hard-wired in your cranium, you wouldn't know what the fook to do. 

But as the ‘frying’ proceeds you may find that you no longer care what to do and let the ‘doing’ unfold however it may, because you have no “choice” anyway, so why sweat the big stuff?

Artwork by Zoran Nova

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

The Removal of Free-will Coloured Spectacles

As opposed to the mythical memes passed down through a hundred generations and, thus, being accepted as truth, your actual “awakening” entails a grieving process and not some enchanted garden of bliss bunny bullshit.
Of course, you've never had free-will, but you have yet to realize this as a fact that informs all other thoughts, feelings and behaviors. In the meantime, you continue to conduct your life within an illusion of control as if you had something to do with anything that happens externally or internally in your personal world.
Denial: 90% of egocentrica mammalian’s live in complete denial.

They cannot grieve the loss of free-will, because they believe all their choices come from autonomous intentions of a deliberating volitional “self.” They continue to function as if they made choices entirely contingent on their own free-agency and continue to experience the anxiety, depression, anger and guilt that living this illusion demands. They feel pride in accomplishments and disappointment in failure, as if they actually made choices free of all influence.

Yet, there are some that claim “I may not have a choice in what happens to me, but I can choose how to respond,” completely ignorant of the fact that they did not make themselves, had absolutely no involvement in the construction of the brain circuitry that informs them exactly how to respond and are genetically hard-wired to perceive reality exactly as they do, with no possible alterations to that perception.
“It is true nonetheless that our idea of free will, vague, amorphous and ultimately incoherent as it may be, is still so much a part of our culture that most of us see everything around us through (as it were) free-will-coloured spectacles. We think we discern the workings of free will in our world, just as religious people think they discern the workings of God. And this vision is self-validating and self-perpetuating, because the more we see the world in this way the more reason we think we have to believe that it really is this way. And we aren’t going to take off the spectacles because we don’t know we’re wearing them.” Oerton, Richard (2012-10-02). The Nonsense of Free Will: Facing up to a false belief (p. 108). Matador. Kindle Edition.
At no point will they ask themselves, “After years of having my every move directed by genetic disposition, parental structuring and socio-cultural influence (the very things that made me precisely what I am now) at what point did all that miraculously dissolve to spontaneously grant “me” the opportunity to make choices completely free of all influence? Exactly when did my ‘will’ become free of all influence?”

The answer is obvious….

ANGER: 5% of current egocentric population is at this stage. A defense mechanism that blocks truth and clouds the mind. I have witnessed it in the comment section on this blog in which the evidence against free-will and for a predetermined causal order, absent all free-will, is so monumentally apparent that it generates fear and with fear is the only catalyst for attack. Upon the first recognition of your utter helplessness to be free and separate of a predetermined causal order, you desperately intensify your efforts to prove that it can be done and you will seek to prove this no matter how often you fail.

BARGAINING: 2% are here. Some seek desperately to extricate themselves from determinism with the claim (more like wishful thinking) of at least a little bit of free-will. The “compatibilists” hold that free-will is essentially a part of determinism (which is absurd) and many, like Daniel Dennett, contend that even though we are 99 percent determined, there is still that tiny 0.999% that we control. When that 0.999% is available to us and where it can be found in the genetically predetermined and socio-culturally pre-formatted ‘personality’ is not apparent but, as many bright minds seem to claim, one day science will locate the capacity for free-will, even though science (specifically, neuroscience) is rapidly progressing in the reverse.

Egocentrica mammalia believes he has sculpted his life based entirely on his freedom of choice, denying that a causal order, that has shaped the universe and continues to do so, shaped him, and any power he might engage to resist this fact, was predetermined long before he even existed (your denying the absence of free-will is hard-wired and this is most likely a genetic predisposition favoring survival fitness). He simply cannot accept that who and what he is was shaped long before he even existed as a manifest organism.

He seeks to break free of genetics, evolution, parental injunctions, socio-cultural influences of the time period he was manifest and the childhood conditioning that he had no choice in experiencing in his formative years, because it was thrust upon him beyond his will, thereby, shaping exactly what he would will in the future.

DEPRESSION: 2% are at this stage and, like denial,  many remain here never to leave. On the path to awakening, depression is the longest and most experientially barren stage. Some take their own lives, many disappear from society never to be seen again and others simply remain at this stage until their death, never realizing the expansive freedom of surrender, they remain inured in limitation and contraction and continue their lamentations that IT NOT BE SO.

In this stage there is usually an intellectual acceptance of the absence of free-will, without the accompanied experience, in a fluctuating self-replicating feedback loop of attempted acceptance and back to non-acceptance.

You may be here for a very long time....

....spiraling down numerous rabbit holes of abject meaninglessness and absurdity, grasping for some sense of what is true and real, only to be nauseatingly disappointed time and time again. You will rigorously prevail in grasping tightly to various contrivances of your fictional social order, only to eventually recognize your pretending can fool others, but keeps you despondent and disengaged.

Decades pass, as many seek solace of “spiritual” ideologies, paradigms and practices, like Buddhism, Zen, non-duality, and other esoteric intellectual distractions, only to be smacked square in the face by the undeniable reason for soothing social constructs that have no purpose but to keep you skipping merrily along by constructing ever more useless neuro-circuitry in 3 lbs of fatty tissue immersed in perpetual darkness.

But you do all this because it is the only purpose of your existence.

ACCEPTANCE: Only a mere 0.5% of egocentric mammalian’s are at this stage. This stage can be considered an “awakening,” because there is no longer a return to the other stages and only accommodating to the fact that every choice ever made had to be made exactly as it was made and could not have been made any differently than it was in the exact moment it was made.
The immediate experience of a causally predetermined existence, contingent on a quadrillion experiences that preceded and absent all free-will, quickly shuts down the circuits useless in supporting this powerful experience.
This ‘short-circuiting’ of other less useful pathways can be a gradual process, although many circuits diminish immediately, particularly socio-culturally conditioned pathways, i.e., self-esteem, status, career, materialistic pursuits or object accumulation, many judgment circuits and other “insecurities’ wired up on the grey matter simply lose electro-chemical current, which can only result in a brain-based sense of freedom (just consider the exhilaration of being free of even just 50% of the the thoughts that arise in that gelatinous blob between your ears. It is literally unimaginable!).

The acceptance stage clearly engenders the chief and most prominent variable of all spirtuo-religious ideologies…surrender. You are, and have been, in charge of nothing and any control you impose upon your reality, you were destined to impose long before you were even born.

Every thought that ever arose in the brain of your mother, and her mother and her mother before her, had to arise exactly as it did, and exactly when it did (time/space continuum) for you to be manifest as a thinking organism and engage the thoughts that you must to allow future generations to manifest as they must, thinking the thoughts that only they must.

When this is truly encountered, as a brain experience and not just the usual firing of contemplative circuitry lighting up frontal lobe sections for years, but amounting to nothing but additional circuitry, there comes a swift and gradual frying of the motherboard.

Yet, this is only an essay in conjecture, the experience defies explanation other than to say that it is completely outside your power to make it happen in any way.

When it comes to “awakening” or “enlightenment,” this is the only fact that need be engaged. But only if your particularly unique neural wiring takes you there and there are only a handful that are heading precisely in that direction and…

…they have not the slightest clue they’re going there.

But they will one day surrender their “free-will coloured spectacles” and perceive a world never before seen.

Artwork by Suliman Almawash

Friday, June 13, 2014

The Indestructible Kevlar Dream

I get a lot of emails that ask,  “yo arsehole, why you always biotchin’  about guilt?"

Guilt maintains the dream-like delusion of individualized egocentric existence and consistently, moment to moment, locks “you” securely in place just by how you think about “you.” There can be NO security in a dream, only the constant seeking of a security that cannot be found by an egocentric self that, by it's very nature, must be lost and guilty of not being found.

To truly see the full nature of your egocentric self, simply follow the trail of guilt, always asking, "is that true and does it matter?" and then just keep going deeper down the rabbit hole.

Not making enough money? Out of work, can’t find a job? Are you drinking more than usual? Yell at your kids too often? Not the man you used to be? Not as pretty as you once were? Are you on food stamps? Foreclose on your mortgage? Been to jail once or twice? Did you have an affair? Eating at McDonalds way too often? Watching too much TV? Spending too much on cigarettes? Failed to clean those gutters? Too much pot? Not spending enough time with your kids? Don’t call your mother enough? Fantasizing about other men/women? Spend too much time playing video games? Wish you had gone to college? Wish you had graduated high school? Do you need to exercise? No money? Need to lose a few pounds? Coveting your neighbor? Wished you owned a BMW? Not rich enough? Smart enough? Not good looking enough? Your personality sucks? If only you smiled more? psychotherapy? Bored with your spouse? Flirting with your coworker? You sleep too much? Don’t sleep enough? You look at porn? You spend too much time alone? You need to get more done? Need to take better care of yourself? You need to wash the car? Need meds? Need to get off meds? Need a new car? Masturbate too much? Should be working more? You should be playing more? You should have more sex? Your life should be more exciting? You should meditate more? You’re kids hate you? You should pray more? You should have more fun? You should know more? You shouldn't have done that? You should have told him off? You should go to church more often? You’re too stupid? You’re too fat? Nobody likes you? You wish you had more friends? You should get a promotion? You should be happier? Bad grades? Too much partying? You’re too depressed? You’re too anxious? You’re too old? You’re not funny enough? Everybody thinks you’re an asshole? You’re a crappy parent? Why are you wasting time reading this? People think you’re boring? You hate your coworkers too much? You hate everyone too much? You hate yourself too much? You have ugly feet? You should be different? You need to improve your self-esteem? Women/men don’t find you attractive? Your eyes are too far apart? You have no ass? Your tits are too big? You need a better job? Your tits are too small? You should pay off that credit card? You drive a hoopty? Little dick? Everybody thinks you’re lazy? Everybody thinks you’re dumb? You shouldn't think these thoughts? You need to get more things done around the house? You waste too much time? You should be more positive? You pick your nose too much? You hate your mother? You hate your father? You should be more active? You hate your kids? You don’t know what to do? You need a lower rate on your mortgage? You should be doing what you’re supposed to do? You should be doing what you want to do? You should get a divorce? Your life sucks? You should be more spiritual? You should be more loving? You should be more outspoken? You should have an affair? You should be more spontaneous? You need anger management? You should have a better credit rating? You should do what they tell you? You should live more? You should be dead? You should have a purpose? You failed to meet your goals? You should have goals? That ship has sailed? Living with your parents? Shop at Walmart? Voted for Obama? Voted for Bush? Didn’t vote? Got an abortion? You think about sex too much? Cheated on your taxes? You hate the government? You hate women? You don’t trust men? You think there’s more to life than this? You wish your spouse loved you? You wish your kids liked you? You wish more people liked you? You wish you liked yourself? You wish you could find love? You just need a break? You wish you could love your family? You wish you could love your job? You think God hates you? You hate God? You wish you could write like me?

Etcetera, etcetera, etcetera, on and on, year after year, month after month, day after day, moment to moment, ad infinitum…..

What have you done? What have you NOT done? When will you do it? When will you stop? When will you change? When will things be different? When will you succeed? When will “you” be what you should be? When will you be what you want to be? When will you know what you want to be? Shouldn’t you know by now? Soon? Tomorrow? In a week, a month, ten years? In time?

Not awakened yet? No enlightenment today? Then when? Aren’t “they” enlightened? Why not you? After 20 years of deep spiritual practices and contemplation are you there yet? No? Why not? Is something wrong with you? Are you not advanced enough? Are you not doing something right? Are you on the wrong path? Can you ignore centuries of historical precedence? Which is the right path? Are you not worthy?

What’s wrong with you? Does it matter what you do, if you can never be right? Why are you doing that? Shouldn’t you be doing this? Why aren’t you doing what they do? What are you afraid might happen?

You first learned the experience of guilt from your parents when you failed to comply with a rule. You learned of public guilt (shame/embarrassment) from public school whenever you made a mistake. When your loved ones are “wrong” correction must always involve guilt. The entire social system is based solely on finding guilt and justifying innocence. Adam and Eve were guilty and every religious-spiritual ideology on the face of the earth is built on a foundation of individual guilt.

Guilt is the fabric of an indestructible Kevlar dream. Every thought in your mind, is another stitch in time. Guilt makes your reality virtually bulletproof.

Awakening literally dissolves ALL guilt.

Are you there yet?


Artwork by David Mach - "Die Harder"

Monday, May 5, 2014

"You" Are Just Along For The Ride....

Free-will demands "cognitive dissonance" or that of holding two polar opposite ideas simultaneously, which obviously seeks consonance or 'freely' choosing the 'correct' perspective" for relief.

It does seem apparent that "being in the moment" is nothing more than a detachment from belief circuits that ascribe to a self-based will that is free.

It also seems apparent that every "awakened" master simply realized this as fact, thereby, neuro-plastically disrupting brain chemistry and eventually altering and re-routing previously programmed circuits to generate a brain state for which "enlightenment" concepts were then superimposed for the sake of communication.

Hence,  "enlightenment" or "awakening" is nothing more than the total and complete termination of all cognitive dissonance, which can only be ended when the option of 'choice' is neuro-plastically removed entirely from the circuits.

So relax, sit back, and allow the brain to simply do what it does, since this is what has been occurring all along anyway.

You have always just been along for the ride and nothing more than that....

(vid's a bit long, but very informational as a means of gradually gaining freedom from an internalized core referred to erroneously as an I-me "self" that makes 'choices' free of stimuli influence)

There is a much bigger picture that an ego-centered core-self cannot fathom:

"We are the global network of neuro-chemical reactions. And the self amplifying cycle of acceptance and acknowledgement, sustained by the daily choices in our interactions, is the chain reaction that will ultimately define our collective ability to overcome imagined differences and look at life in the grand scheme of things" (video)